April 22, 2014

Anonymous asked: Let me get this straight, I buy you a sex toy for your use in achieving multiple orgasms, but I get nothing but a blog mention? That's it? Besides, you are a model, aren't you gals rolling in the money - or at least that's the lie perpetrated by your co-workers, and should be able to buy your own without begging?

Yes. I have been completely upfront and honest about what I am willing to trade in exchange for a stranger buying me a sex toy - a public thank you, permanently displayed on my blog, and a handwritten thank you note posted anywhere in the world (the link’s here, generous readers); unless the sender desires anonymity of course. This essentially translate to “personal attention in exchange for new types of orgasm” (and/or your personal lascivious fantasy about me using it, though I’d rather not hear TOO many details about that). I’m not going to pretend I’ll fall in love with you in exchange for an Eroscilliator.

The other day I was at the London Fetish Fair and picked up a business card for an online kink shop. When I went home I looked them up and saw them selling what appears to be a rather ordinary wooden paddle for £100. £100! I own a wooden paddle that cost £20. No idea who buys those, though I guess someone must think they’re worth it. But I’m not going to go up to the shop owner at the next LFF and tell her I think her prices are ridiculous, because if I think the deal that her shop offers is unfair I am absolutely free to not purchase items from her. She isn’t insisting that I buy her products, she isn’t bothering me in any way, she is simply existing on the internet with her offer and if I don’t want it I will simply ignore it.

…Do you see the parallel here?

Most fulltime models - other than top top supermodels - make a reasonable but not exceptional wage. Obviously I’m not a top supermodel, I never worked more than part time, and I’m not currently working as a model because I’m busy with my degree (+ a few other more complicated reasons I won’t go into here). So no, I am not “rolling in the money”.

Your misreading of the average model’s earning power is probably down to any decent model projecting the impression of being constantly extremely busy and high-earning. Because giving that impression is good for business.

April 21, 2014

Anonymous asked: From Fetlife "I am probably not interested in your email" unless "You would like to buy me a sex toy." Well fuck that bullshit. Not going to buy you shit - fuck you and horse you road in on. Thanks for all the photos though, i will make sure they get distributed far and wide.

I’m sick and tired of you whining internet bitches going on about being contacted by “guys I don’t know”. It’s the fucking internet - if you put your naughty bits on display, be prepared to get messages, pure and fucking simple snowflake. Then you get on your high horses and act like you are too good to be contacted, at the same time post endlessly about how much depression you have about “feeling bad about yourself”. Oh go cry fucking river already. You are white and live in the UK.

(This was a two part ask.)

….Okay, I’ll bite.

You are perfectly welcome to not buy me things. That is fine - you can spend your money however you like. Feel free to spread photographs of me over the net, I don’t hide anything and it should be no surprise to anyone to see the name “Tansy Blue” attached to copious amounts of kink and nudity. If anything it’ll get me more followers. (And maybe more arsehole anon asks? I can always delete them if I want.)

If I was concerned about these images being spread across the internet I would not post them publicly. Obviously.

I like how being publicly naked dehumanises me in your eyes to the point that I should be perfectly happy to receive contact from everyone on the internet, no matter how unwelcome or unsolicited. Interesting thought process. How much skin is acceptable for someone to show before they become public property? Should someone who only posts pictures of themselevs in t shirt and jeans be willing to receive messages from anyone, with any content and any tone, or should only people who appear naked be willing to do that? Bikini? Topless? Should a man who posts topless images be willing to receive the same, or is this a woman-only thing? What if she’s doing a handbra? Fascinating.

And if you’d actually read my profile properly, you’d see that I don’t address that comment to “guys”, or even “girls”, at all - just “people I don’t know”. I’m always happy to get emails from people I’ve met in real life.

Unfortunately neither race nor geography is a panacea for mental illness. It’d be nice if it was. If you are aware of a country in which no one becomes depressed, develops anxiety disorders, or experiences bodily dysmorphia, please make me aware so I can move there tomorrow.

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Filed under: messages 
April 21, 2014

hartewo asked: Hi. thanks for the things you share with everybody about your personal and professional life. I am your mexican fan #1. Love

Thank you. <3 I shall try to keep writing.

April 18, 2014
lacigreen:

 

HAHAHAHAHAHA.

lacigreen:

 

HAHAHAHAHAHA.

(Source: coolator, via kylaiajmaa)

2:39am  |   URL: http://tmblr.co/ZlRzhv1DMEUh-
  
Filed under: reblogs 
April 18, 2014
Playdate with Number 9

mimieuxinmadrid:

image

As requested (by her), here is a picture of Mimieux sucking cock. Go follow her because she is hot and writes hot things. (There is a long kinky story attached to this picture, you should read it.)

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Filed under: mimieux reblogs 
April 17, 2014
There's No Such Thing As Bad Sex

snuglomaniac:

My sex life is going through a bit of a boom at the moment, something which I wish continues. However this wouldn’t be the case if it were not for something a good friend of mine said.

I used to lack sexual confidence, not because I’m trans*, heck I’m a megalomaniac I ‘know’ I’m the apple of…

I believe I am the “good friend” mentioned here. Also my friend Snuglomaniac has a blog now, she’s really cool, you should follow her, she posts interesting things.

3:32pm  |   URL: http://tmblr.co/ZlRzhv1DIzdlP
  
Filed under: snuglomaniac 
April 12, 2014

dirkbot:

If you notice me reblogging

  • a repost
  • stolen art
  • false information
  • etc.

please let me know, you’re not rude or annoying and I actually do give a fuck and I will correct my mistake, thank you

(via kylaiajmaa)

April 10, 2014
Interesting fact about me.

I have fantasisies about cutting bits of my body off with scalpels, because I hate my size and wish I were skinnier.

I do not want to lose weight, or rather, I want to, but I know that if I try I’ll fall into obsession and disorder and no, no, no.

I do not want people to tell me I’m beautiful or hot or whatever - it’s nice, and thank you, but it’s not what I need and I don’t know how to respond to it.

I just want to be able to sit with my belly hanging over my belt and not want to slice it off. How do I do that?

April 8, 2014
Assault tag update.

This is a quick one, just to keep my assault tag up to date and complete. (The assault tag is where I track instances where I feel like I have had someone else’s sexuality forced upon me non-consensually, through unwanted and repeated sexual advances, unasked for touching, etc. Not everything in the assault tag constitutes an assault in the legal meaning of the word.)

I went to Subversion back in January, and wore underwear and heels, which is perfectly appropriate wear for that kind of club. I was standing at the edge of one of the rooms looking for my boyfriend, when someone started running their finger round the inner edge of my bra. I assumed it was someone I knew’s weird-ass way of greeting me, so I didn’t respond instantly (because even after all this time I assume that an unexpected touch is friendly), but upon looking up I realised it was a stranger.

At first I was calm, simply saying, “excuse me, I’d really rather if you asked before – ” but when this made no difference my tone sharpened; I backed away, wagged my finger at them – literally, I’m a walking cliché – and said – oh I can’t remember what I said. Something angry and pissed off. They stopped, my friend appeared at my shoulder, and I ranted at him briefly about what bollocks this all was. Then got on with my night.

This is notable because the person touching me may have been female. I can’t remember precisely what they looked like, it was all over too quickly and the lighting was too bad, but I think I remember them wearing a bra. Of course that doesn’t necessitate that they’re female, especially in a fetish club, but I can’t remember anything else about them that would give a hint to their gender – in my head their face looks male but I have no idea how accurate that memory is. If they were female, this would be the first time in the history of the assault tag that a woman has been in it as the perpetrator.

This is the seventh post in the assault tag (discounting this one about catcalls which relates events that started before I began keeping this blog). I’ve been keeping this blog for very slightly over 2 years now, which means that – on average – something happens that I feel needs to be written here once every 3 to 4 months.

Why the fuck, in 21st century Britain, am I being groped more often than I get a haircut.

(Important note: don’t let this colour your impression of Subversion. It’s a great club with great people behind it. Dickheads attend every club, it’s not the management’s fault.)

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Filed under: assault kink clubs subversion 
April 8, 2014
Any good Game of Thrones Tumblrs out there?

I NEED ONE. RIGHT NOW.

I need one that posts some variety of commentary/humour as well as pictures/gifs (gifs with well-placed text count as commentary), that hasn’t read A Song of Ice and Fire so won’t spoil it for me, and that doesn’t post 50 times a day.

Does such a thing exist?

April 7, 2014
tansyblue:

Neil Huxtable

tansyblue:

Neil Huxtable

April 6, 2014
The 7 point stress scale.

Someone on Tumblr (I think it was lottelodge) linked to this, a 10-point scale for tracking autistic overload. I thought it was a great idea and wrote up my own, for tracking stress, and I’m sharing it here because…well I share everything here, essentially. I’m finding it a useful tool for tracking the various ups and downs of my Issues with anxiety, it’s useful to go “this is a stage 5 situation, I shall cope with [relevant action]”, especially because at higher stages I can’t think straight - just when I need coping mechanisms most, I am most incapable of remembering them.  I’d encourage you to write your own if you have problems with stress, sensory overload, low mood, etc.

It is quite a rough guide, I’m normally somehwere in between stages and showing traits of a few different ones, but t’s a useful tool regardless.

(For reference in case anyone reading this doesn’t know, I’m on the autistic spectrum - official diagnosis PDD-NOS if you know what that means - and have ongoing, debilitaitng mental health problems, most of which fall under the broad umbrellas of “depression” and “anxiety disorder”.)

——

Stage 1: Relaxed

Internal: thinking clearly, thoughts wide-ranging and diverse, good attention span, confident.

External: happy, confident and relaxed, lots of things to say, good at listening.

Action needed: N/A

e.g. spending time with partners or very close friends, by self in room.

Stage 2: Minor Effort

Internal: thinking clearly though not good at thinking beyond immediate situation, shorter attention span, occasional self-doubt but primarily confident.

External: similar to 1 but shorter attention span, can’t listen as well.

Action needed? N/A

e.g. with close friends, by self in familiar environment.

Stage 3: Normal Effort

Internal: thinking clearly but very focused on immediate situation, short-ish attention span, paying close attention to behaviour in order to avoid self-doubt.

External: gregarious, flits between groups, “social butterfly”, often presents as quite hyper and excitable.

Action needed? N/A, but will often be exhausted after more than 3 or 4 hours of stage 3.

e.g. most social situations, by self in unfamiliar environment.

(NB, adding sensory stressors like loud music or a messy environment will tip this to a 4.)

[Starting at 4, the longer spent at any stress level will push the stress levels higher. “Max time” is indeed the maximum; if I’m functioning at a “high 4” or whatever, it will be less time]

Stage 4: High Effort

Internal: worrying about self and presentation excessively, constantly challenging negative thoughts, very limited attention span

External: unremarkable; reasonably social, makes polite conversation, not as social as 3 but can initiate interaction.

Action needed? N/A, but be careful to limit time in stage 4 and take regular breaks to avoid tipping into stage 5.

e.g. social situations with >50% people I don’t know, by self in hostile environment.

Max time: up to around 4 hours before tipping into stage 5.

Read More

April 5, 2014
tansyblue:

Harvey Gordon

tansyblue:

Harvey Gordon

April 4, 2014
Consent is at once an unrealistic ideal, and a really low standard.

So let’s have some real talk.

 And we’ll start off with this: you have never had sex with someone in which they gave full, enthusiastic, unqualified verbal consent to everything you did. Neither have I.

 I have never had sex with a woman and asked, repeatedly: “can I touch your left breast? Can I touch your right breast? Can I touch your left nipple? Can I touch your right nipple?”. I just assume that if a woman is willing to sleep with me, they are okay with me touching their breasts and nipples. Equally, when I go down on a male, I assume that their consent to me sucking their penis extends to me licking their testicles. But I don’t extend that assumption to their anus. I don’t like rimming people to start with, but even if I did, I wouldn’t assume that someone being okay with me licking their dick/balls means they are also okay with me licking their arse. There is no particular reason for me assuming that if a woman wants to have sex with me she’s okay with me touching her nipples, I just assume it because it’s culturally normal – there is no particular reason for me assuming that a man who wants to have sex with me doesn’t want me touching his anal region, I just assume it because it’s culturally normal. Actually, I have slept with a couple of women who’ve asked for their nipples not to be touched, and also with a couple of men who have asked for their anus to be touched. So the assumptions “if a woman consents to sex she consents to having her nipples touched” and “if a man consents to sex he doesn’t consent to having his anus touched” are, in my experience, false.

What’s the point of this ramble? Firstly, assumptions of what’s consented to when someone consents to sex are dictated by sexual culture, which - much surprise very wow - doesn’t match up with what each individual wants. Secondly, when I have sex with someone, I make assumptions about what they want and do not get consent for each individual act – and I bet you do that too.

More to the point, it’s functionally impossible to do this. Imagine if you genuinely did get full verbal consent for each action; sex would become impossible. Break it down – let’s say that for every part of the body you can lick, kiss or touch it, and that each part of the body is considered as its own section for consent-giving purposes. Imagine trying to kiss down someone’s neck to their breast if you got full verbal consent for each act:

Read More

April 3, 2014
tansyblue:

Scott Chappell

tansyblue:

Scott Chappell

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